Family Photo at the Basilica de Guadalupe, Mexico City

 


Do you see Richard and I are the only one´s clearly happy to be visting the Basilica in Mexico City. They even have the bus that Pope John Paul II rode in cordened off there! We thought it would be the bus to take us to the top of the hill where Juan Diego encountered Guadalupe. Sadly we were wrong and our kids didn´t understand why there was a perfectly good bus sitting there not moving. Notice the scorn in the faces of the señoras, it´s okay, I´ve grown accustomed to it. my kids will never be clean enough, bathed properly enough, hair brushed just so, it´s like being with your mother-in-law. Only she doesn´t speak the same language and she doesn´t live with you so really, who cares! The non-religious, spiritual person that I am, I pray to Guadalupe daily. The mother of all mother´s...I came to discover Mexico and the patron mother at the time in my life I really needed it. Again, how do I get so lucky these innocent gifts keep falling in my lap?

P.S. Betty, I am not moving back until I have to, thankfully that isn´t right now. Let Guadalupe work whatever miracles she wants.

Dia de Nuestra Sra. Guadalupe

 

Dia de Nuestra Sra. Guadalupe

 

What Language are You Speaking?

Conversations with Roarke go something like this:

R: I don´t speak Englés?
Me: Really? Habla puro en Español?
R: No, I don´t speak Spanish.
Me: What language do you speak?
R: I speak ROARKE! I´m Roarke mommy!! (In his most exasperated, "gee you are really not smart mom!" voice.)

I laughed at how funny I thought he was. What would I call it Roarkish, Roarkese? Suddenly the lightbulb went off and I smashed it over my own head. We are speaking different languages, that is why my 3 year old argues with me...we simply do not understand the language the other person is speaking. How do I make it more clear, I´m speaking English, his native language. How on earth do I speak Roarkese?

What I Learned Today Is...

Half a dramamine tablet an hour and a half before a dentist visit does not make Roarke go to sleep. He will still force you to pry his mouth open for impressions while you´ve contorted your body to restrain his in a very small dental chair. After that scene, female dentists in Mexico are reasonable, ni modo, come back in six months and we´ll try agin, $150 pesos($10 USD roughly) for impressions. Are you kidding me? These are the most sane dentists I´ve ever met, don´t traumatize a kid and don´t gouge a parent. Half a dramamine does knock Roarke out 3 hours later, into a scary deep sleep, that just isn´t right. He is also sleepy the rest of the day, making for bad attitudes. The cure for that is Martha being in charge an abandoned tire and a steep driveway. Which makes Roarke even more tired, hence, my blogging early. Hooray?!

Second lesson of the day came with the junta for Sebastian´s 2º grade at Los Charcos. I am a terrible Waldorf student. When did I forget to play the flute, the air has to come out just right you know. Simple math like counting by 3´s...there is so much counting while moving your body I get confused, along with the other parents, I am grateful for that. One man said "I just can´t." Can´t what? Do what your kid does everyday? That should be required. We ask so much out of our children, sit down, be quiet, what does this equal, how do you say this..., how would you do that...think, pay attention, look at the world around you, listen to your heart. Shouldn´t we also be prepared to observe their day as they experience it? Now I know why Sebastian´s head wants to explode when he comes home, thinking outside of the box is hard. I´m asking my kids to do it, I should pay them the courtesy of walking with them.

Ordinary Words to Live By

The amazing quote for the day sent to me by Fico and Paloma and corrections from Elsanne, Nelson Mandela didn´t say it Marianne Williamson should receive all the credit for these words that are like a lifeboat; slippery, a bit damp, but safe and surviving.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
Marianne Williamson

Human Love Song

Well maybe Playing For Change is not a new movement, but I´ve only discovered it today. My friend and acupuncturist, Sandra, sent this to me this morning, how I needed it. Take a moment and get a box of tissues while you watch this video. Beautiful is the only word I have and enjoy.
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December Mornings

 

Eight Kids Later

Well, four hours with eight children by yourself really isn´t so bad. Today we had the mother of all play dates, friends help us when we have hard days, a total of eight kids from ages 8 to 3. What the heck it´s only 5 extra kids, they can all wipe their own bottoms, that is half the battle! Surprisingly there weren´t any terrible moments, Roarke smashed his finger but didn´t you already know he would do something? ¡Viva con gusto! That´s my boy. We had a sad moment though, another little girl´s father lives far away and at that moment she really needed her daddy. So familiar with this scenario I am, what can you do but scoop up a kid and hug them? You can tell the child that your heart can hold oceans full of love and that is where your daddy always is, swishing away with your heartbeat. But that does not make the physical absence any better for the child. You can feel it but not see it? That sucks and how is that fair? I can´t answer that question and I admit to crying openly in front of my children when they cry tears of sadness from loss.

Our family is separated by miles and an invisible border, the kids do not understand what is going on, mommy and daddy love each other, why can´t we all be in the same place? Disjointed living so we can stay in Mexico as opposed to Indiana and still no daddy, again this is not fair and it sucks. But this is our life and everyday I try to encourage beautiful moments to bloom among us, though I´ve killed the grass in this spiritual journey...ah, ni modo as I have become fond of saying. This week, everyone had an opportunity to a mental health day, Isabel was the only one to decline saying "I LOVE SCHOOL!". Just last year she clung to my leg refusing to go to school, this week she was the center of attention for about 7 kids at school, so happy to see her. How life can change in the small space of one year.

Progressing through motherhood and life is my meditation for the day. What we are capable of as women and mothers, the flux of the stages of womanhood and motherhood... Always we are moving foward, definitely with time but also spiritually. I have never been more grateful and more pissed off at the gifts I receive from children and I love them for that. More than that I love the lessons everyday that; people change, situations change, how you can be afraid but it´s the wheel in motion and you cannot stop for fear. How did I ever get so lucky to have all this wisdom put in my lap so innocently?

The Fading Day

 


As the sun went down I noticed a lovely shadow on my bedroom door. I noticed this after Roarke had been shut inside my room screaming for 30 minutes (about a dumptruck he threw about 20 feet that I took it away, in case you´re wondering). After the storm the calm came in shadow shapes. S; for slow,surrender,stop screaming,smile. I stopped, paused to admire and captured the S moment. As the sun sinks into the valley twilight brings; color unimaginably tranquil, cows lowing, crickets still chirping, airplanes coming, shadows of pepper tree fronds, Venus, Jupiter and a crescent Moon, cool air, a moment of peace.

First Hand Craft

 
 
 
 


This is really my first hand crafted project as an adult. It will be for sale at the Christmas Bazaar for Los Charcos, it´s my Isabel inspiration. Isabel will get one for Christmas also, I´m on a roll and maybe the craft goddesses are shining down on me! I was pleased with my handwork so I had to show it off.